


The Werewolf

by prettylittlecandid31



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Magic, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Werewolf Remus Lupin, Wizards
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2021-02-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:01:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25489666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettylittlecandid31/pseuds/prettylittlecandid31
Summary: Remus Lupin has been keeping his "furry little problem" a secret, when one day, the secret comes out. Friendships are tested and loyalty is strained in this tale of old prejudices, secrets, and enemies.
Relationships: James Potter & Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Marlene McKinnon
Comments: 14
Kudos: 28





	1. The Full Moon

Chapter One: The Full Moon 

James fumbled with the latch on his trunk. He felt too tired to look down, so he let his hand do all of the work. After a few more seconds of blindly struggling, he succeeded. 

Satisfied, James looked up and noticed Remus, who had just woken up, sitting on the side of his bed. He appeared to be rubbing his wrist, like it was bothering him. 

"Remus, you okay?" James asked. 

"It's fine. Just a bruise." Remus' hand immediately dropped back to his side. He started rummaging around his own trunk. 

James let the subject drop. He had learned after a couple of years that every times he caught Remus looking moody or upset or injured, prying wouldn't help. Remus didn't like bringing attention to his pain. He preferred to suffer through it quietly. James was the exact opposite. Anytime he was in pain, he always had to make a big deal out of it. 

"Oi, who turned on the sun?" 

Sirius rolled over, squinting at the morning light that was coming through the window. 

"Look who's finally awake," James drawled teasingly. "How was your make out session last night?" 

"Oh, shut up." Sirius muttered, rolling back over and pulling the blanket back over his head. 

Fifteen minutes later, James and Remus were fully dressed and ready to depart. 

"Get up, lazy bones." Remus said, shoving the lump under the blankets lightly. 

Sirius gave a noncommittal grunt. 

Remus looked at James and they both shrugged. 

"Fine, but it's not on me if we don't save you a sausage at breakfast." 

****

The dining hall was crowded, as usual. James and Remus sat across from each other and loaded their plates. 

"Good morning boys!" Peter said, appearing randomly on James' side of the table. 

Remus and James grunted a greeting, while still shoveling food into their mouths. 

Sirius walked down the Great Hall moments later, his feet dragging with lack of sleep. 

"I'm exhausted." He said, before loading his own plate. 

"Like we couldn't tell." Remus said sarcastically. 

"Maybe you'd get more sleep if you stopped snogging every pretty girl within your sight line." James said, grinning. 

"I could say the same to you." Sirius retorted, grabbing a breakfast sausage. 

James ran a hand through his hair. 

"That's not true. I only have eyes for one girl." His eyes automatically glanced toward a ginger-haired girl who was sitting toward the middle of the Gryffindor table. She was laughing with her friend, Marlene. 

"But Lily hates you." Peter commented. 

"Oh, come off it, everyone likes me." James said arrogantly. 

"No, Evans really does hate your guts," Sirius said. "Last night I heard her ranting about your latest stunt in Charms class." 

James' eyes brightened. "She noticed me?" 

"Of course she noticed you, _everyone_ notices you. It's mostly just that she doesn't like what she sees." Remus said, rolling his eyes. 

"Or maybe she's just pretending to hate me, and really just finds me... endearing!" James said hopefully. 

Sirius laughed. Now that he had some food inside of him, he was starting to feel more awake. 

"Oh sure! Just about as endearing as the squid in the Black Lake." 

James scowled into his pancakes while Remus and Peter laughed. 

"What class do we have first, Remus?" Peter asked. 

"Transfiguration."

****

Remus went to Professor Dumbledore's office in the early evening. His scars had been bothering him earlier, and he had found a fresh cut that had revealed itself after he'd been subconsciously scratching his leg during the middle of Charms.

"Good evening, Remus." 

"Good evening, Professor."

The night Remus had first told Professor Dumbledore his secret had been traumatizing. He had been in the hospital wing, crying himself to sleep after a particularly nasty night when he'd heard soft footsteps at the door. He closed his eyes and tried to wipe away his tears before the figure reached the chair beside his creaky hospital bed.

"Hello, Remus. My name is Professor Dumbledore." 

Remus had sat up carefully. He did not reply. 

"Headmaster Dippet sent me." Dumbledore continued. "He believes he may have a solution for this- problem." 

"There's no solution." Remus had responded quietly. "It's irreversible." 

"Of that, I am quite aware." Dumbledore responded calmly. "I am simply here to offer you a place where you may- transform- in peace." 

Dumbledore had extended his hand, and Remus had mutely taken it. And that was when he learned of what was now called the Shrieking Shack.

Dumbledore spread rumors that it was haunted by a particularly nasty ghost who screamed at his enemies. Of course, none of that was true. The screams came from Remus. The reason Dumbledore started the rumors was to keep people away from the shack. It was to protect the students from Remus. And it was also there to give Remus a place to go when he transformed. 

Every full moon, the Professor would take Remus to the hidden entrance. It was a tree known as the Whomping Willow. It did exactly what one would expect a Whomping Willow to do. The way inside of the tree was to press a small knot on one of the exposed tree roots. The branches would stop moving, and a trap door would open. There, Remus would descend into his nightmare. At dawn, Remus would return to his dorm room and fall into his bed, getting a few hours of sleep before he had to pretend that nothing had happened. 

His friends didn't know. He was afraid that if he told them, he would no longer have friends. So he lied about his early bedtime and he lied about the bruises and he lied about the dark circles under his eyes. 

"Too many assignments." 

"I tripped and fell." 

"A late night of homework."

The excuses worked, all too well, and although his monthly routine was exhausting, the lying was even more so. 

But that was the way it had to be. None of his friends could ever discover that he was a werewolf.


	2. Snape's Suspicion

Chapter Two: Snape's Suspicion 

Remus was having a relatively good day. His friends were less annoying than usual. His new injuries weren't bothering him that much. Homework was pretty light. 

"Hey Snivellus!" James' voice carried clear across the courtyard. Remus sighed. Apparently, James had had the impression that this was the perfect time to torture his least favorite person on the face of the Earth. 

_Great,_ Remus thought. _There goes my relatively good day._

Severus Snape, or "Snivellus," as he had been dubbed by Sirius their first year at Hogwarts, was James Potter's mortal enemy. Currently, he was ignoring James' taunting voice, moving quickly towards the edge of the courtyard as fast as his stick-like legs could carry him. 

Remus saw James' wand flick, and Snape fell haplessly to the ground. 

"Bit clumsy today, aren't we?" James remarked cheerily, walking casually by the fallen figure. He smirked towards the onlookers and kept walking. At his heels, Sirius and Peter chortled. 

Remus watched silently, half wishing he could disappear. For an instant, he was glad that he hadn't been standing with them while this particular event had happened. Yes, James, Sirius, and Peter were his best friends in the whole world, but sometimes he didn't approve of some of their antics. His friends turned the corner, disappearing from view. Before Remus realized what he was doing, he found himself standing by Snape, his hand extended. 

"I'm sorry." Remus said. 

Snape glared up at him. 

"Get your filthy hand out of my face." He hissed, standing up. 

"Sorry." Remus repeated, and he began to walk away. He didn't notice a book slip out of his beat up book bag. He didn't see Snape pick it up and read the title. Nor did he see Snape tuck the book into his own book bag and shuffle off into the castle. 

*****

Unlike Remus, Snape was _not_ having a relatively good day. His friends were even more annoying than usual, homework was bursting out of the seams of his book bag, and Lily Evans wasn't speaking to him. 

_It hadn't been his fault_ , he convinced himself, for the fifteenth time in a row. _He didn't mean what he had said. Lily just didn't understand._

It was hard, being an outcast, a Slytherin, and still trying to maintain some dignity when absolute gits like that James Potter existed and seemed to constantly appear when you least expected it. Sometimes the pressure of it all just made Severus want to snap. 

He glanced casually towards Lily, who was attempting to turn a mouse into a pincushion. They were in Transfiguration, a class that Severus truly despised. Mice were vermin. They belonged dead in a cauldron, not alive and on his desk, squirming like a worm. Lily seemed happy, laughing with her friend, Marlene.

He placed the mouse on the desk, willing it not to move. He pointed his wand at it, uttering the spell. 

" _Mitransformus_ _pincuns."_

Nothing happened. A few small sparks came out of his wand. The stupid mouse was no less alive, or pointy. 

He heard a small snicker from behind him. He turned to see James Potter, laughing. 

"What're you looking at?" He snapped. 

James grinned. "Oh, nothing. Just my perfect mouse-turned-pincushion." 

James lifted his mouse-now-pincushion up, so Severus could see it. Severus stared at it, then shrugged. 

"It still has a tail." He pointed out, then turned back around and hunched over his desk. The stupid mouse was gone. 

"Here," A familiar voice said. A hand picked up a squeaking mouse and put it down on his desk. He looked up into the green eyes of Lily Evans. 

"Thank-" He started to say, but she had already turned away, and was now sitting by Marlene once more. 

He smiled to himself. Perhaps Lily did not completely hate him after all. 

Transfiguration ended, and Severus left the class quickly. He had a bit of time before he had to show up at Herbology, and there was something he wanted to look into. There was a book. Potter's friend, Remus, had had it in his book bag. It had fallen through his broken seams, and now Severus was in possession of it. He wouldn't have taken it, expect for one small reason. 

The book was on magical creatures. And there had been the corner of a page folded down on a particular chapter. Page three-hundred and ninety four. The chapter on werewolves. 

Severus had always thought that there was something off about Remus. Ever since the day he had gone to see Professor Dumbledore about a question he had pertaining to Defense Against the Dark Arts, only to find he had interrupted a conversation between Remus and the Professor. Remus had had this look in his eyes. One of great fear. 

Everyone who looks afraid is always hiding something. Severus would know. 

He was almost to the library, when he felt his body slammed against a wall. 

"How dare you speak to her." 

James Potter was glaring at him with a fierce intensity. Immediately, Severus knew what was occurring. 

"I didn't." Severus protested, lying through his teeth. 

"You don't have the right to speak to her after what you did." 

"No, he doesn't." 

James turned. A fiery redhead was standing in front of them. 

"Evans!" James said nervously, running his hand through his hair. "How ya been?"

Lily glared at both of them. 

"You listen to me, Potter. I don't need to be defended. I can do that myself. Now get out of here before I make you regret the day you were born." 

James wilted, then turned and walked down the hall. 

Severus exhaled. 

"I'm sorry-" 

"Save it." 

Then Lily turned and walked in the opposite direction that James had gone, leaving Severus standing alone. 

****

It was late in the library. The sun had already gone down. The stars were starting to appear in the window. Severus sat, hunched over the book. He opened the book to page three hundred and ninety four. 

And found nothing. 

No scrawled handwriting in the margins. No hidden secrets. No clues. 

Nothing except for the folded corner. 


	3. Marlene

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: There's some language in this chapter.

Chapter 3: Marlene 

Remus rummaged through his trunk, throwing random objects to the floor. James watched him in amazement. he hadn't seen him this agitated in a long time. Something must have really been bothering him. 

"Dude, what's wrong?" James asked, catching a flying sock in midair. 

"I can't find it," Remus said, sitting back in defeat. "It's missing." 

"What's missing?" Sirius asked, turning away from the window. 

"A book. I need it for Charms." 

James was surprised. "Really? That's what's got you all worked up?" 

Remus ignored him, shoving clothes and other items back into his trunk in a haphazard manner. 

Sirius crossed over and flopped onto Remus' bed, his legs crossed beneath him. 

"Don't worry. We'll help you find it." 

They spent all morning looking for it. In between classes, they scoured the entire castle. James tried to ask Remus for more details, but he never gave them. Helping someone find a book when you don't know what it's called is hard. By lunch, James got frustrated and gave up. 

"It's no use," James said. "That thing could be anywhere. We've got Charms in thirty minutes, and there's no way we'll find it before then. Whatever book you're looking for, you can just borrow it from Professor Flitwick. I'm sure he won't say no-" 

"No," Remus said. "I get it. Thank you for your help." 

James smiled, and clapped Remus on the shoulder. "Anytime. I'm going to find Peter. I haven't seen him in awhile. It's unlike him to miss lunch." 

He turned and walked out of the Great Hall. 

Sirius was still sitting next to Remus. He set down the sandwich he had been eating. 

"You don't need that book for Charms, do you?" He asked quietly. Remus was surprised that Sirius hadn't caught on sooner. He was more observant than he looked. He could read Remus... well, like an open book. 

"No." Remus replied. As much as he trusted James, he trusted Sirius a tiny bit more. There was something about him that made Remus feel like he would always be safe around him. 

"I can't tell you right now." Remus said apologetically. 

"I understand. You don't have to explain." 

_No, you don't,_ thought Remus weakly, _but I hope that someday you will._

"Do you remember the last time you had it?" Sirius asked.

Remus wracked his mind for answers, going through all the events of yesterday. 

"Oh, bloody hell." He muttered. "How much time do we have?" 

Sirius checked his watch. "Twenty minutes." 

"Come with me." 

****

They reached the courtyard moments later. Remus let go of Sirius' arm and walked to the exact spot where Severus had fallen the other day. 

Remus swore silently. He had been so careless. The book had probably fallen out of his threadbare book bag, and Severus must have picked it up and taken it. Severus hated him and all his friends. If he knew Remus' secret, he was screwed. He turned to Sirius. 

"Severus has it." 

Sirius' face darkened. "That bastard. Why would he take your book?" 

Remus wanted to tell him what had really happened, but he knew he couldn't. The hatred between Sirius and Severus was almost as strong as James'. 

"It doesn't matter." He said. 

"It does to me!" Sirius exclaimed. "If he came over and messed with you while you were minding your own business, it definitely matters!" 

Remus grabbed Sirius by the shoulders. 

"Calm down," He said. "I can get it back. Don't worry about it." 

Sirius shoved him away. 

"We've been looking for that book all goddamn day, and now that we finally know that that bastard took it, you don't want my help anymore?" 

"It's not like that!" Remus protested. 

Sirius shook his head. "Oh, but it is. You only need us when you know we're in the dark. When are you going to stop pushing people away? You know I'd follow you to the end of the earth, but why is it so hard for you to accept the help of your friends?" 

Remus wanted to yell, _Because if you knew what I was, you wouldn't be my friend,_ but instead he was silent, trying to find a way to deflect Sirius' words. 

"It's just a book." He said. "There's no need to be so dramatic." 

Sirius threw his hands up into the air, like Remus was a helpless child who wasn't listening. 

"Did you even hear me? Do you know what I said?" 

"You'd follow me to the end of the earth." 

"Does that mean anything to you?" Sirius asked, his voice almost breaking. 

"Of course." Remus whispered. 

Sirius took a step closer to him. 

"Then let me help you." He looked deep into Remus' eyes. "Please." 

Remus wanted to. He wanted to tell him why the book was so important to him. He wanted to empty out his soul and lay it bare for Sirius to see. He wanted to kneel down a beg forgiveness for all his lying. But if Sirius knew who he was, he might leave. 

"Plus," Sirius said. "I'm always looking for an excuse to kick a bastard in the teeth."

Remus smiled. "I know, and I'm sorry, but I can't. Go to Charms, and I'll catch up with you, okay?" 

Sirius sighed. He knew when to back down. 

"Fine." 

**** 

Remus found Severus alone in an empty unused classroom. For all its classes, Hogwarts seemed to have a plethora of empty space. When Remus saw him, his back turned toward a bookshelf, he felt all the anger and fear inside him explode. There was something feral inside of him, making him want to hurt someone. 

He grabbed Severus by the robe and shoved his back into the wall, eyes piercing and cold. 

"Alright, you slime ball. Give me back my book." 

Severus grinned. "I don't know what you're talking about." 

Remus shoved him once more. "I don't normally resort to violence, but I am in no mood for games. Give. It. Back." 

Severus was silent for a moment. He must have seen something in Remus' eyes that scared him, because within seconds, the book was back in Remus' hand. 

"Here." Severus said. "Take it." 

Remus released him and started to walk away, but Severus grabbed the edge of his robe until his face was next to Remus' ear. 

"Must be a pretty important book you have there." Severus whispered. 

Remus reeled back. He knew. 

He let go of Remus, who stood stock still, frozen with fear. 

"Don't tell anyone." He whispered. 

Severus smiled. "Tell anyone what?" He asked. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm late for Charms." 

****

Sirius was angry, but his anger soon dissipated during Professor Flitwick's class. There was something about the class that made him very happy. Well, more like some _one._

Her name was Marlene McKinnon. She had an aptitude for Charms, just like her best friend, Lily Evans. In fact, Sirius was of the opinion that she had an aptitude for all magic. But that may have just been because Sirius was head over heels in love with her. 

The first time he admitted that he liked her, James had accused him of staring at Lily, thus breaking "the bro code." They had a row, until Sirius had finally got it into James' love-sick brain that he had not been staring at Lily; he had been staring at Marlene. The fight had ended in friendly banter, and merciless teasing every time they came near her. 

Sirius had tried to interact with her, but every time he did, it failed miserably. For example, one time they had been conjuring flowers in Charms. After several slip ups, Sirius had finally succeeded. He tried to give it to her at the end of class, but James had put a tripping spell on him. So instead of walking gracefully over to her, he fell flat on his face, which crushed the flower. The only plus side to that was that it had made Marlene laugh. 

That was what made Sirius like her the most. Her happiness. Her laughter. He positivity, her kindness... he could go on all day. But, as James constantly reminded him, she was "way too attractive" and "completely out of his league." 

But that didn't stop him from trying. Sirius was stubborn. Like his brother, he went after what he wanted. 

Today, he was determined to make a move. Ever since the flower fiasco, he'd had the spell scribbled on a scrap of paper that he kept in his book bag. He reached into it and whispered the spell. 

A flower appeared in his hand. A yellow rose. 

At the end of class, Sirius beat James to the door, looking for Marlene. He found her. 

"Marlene!" He called, catching up to her. Marlene and Lily stopped. Lily recognized who it was, and sighed, exasperated. Sirius decided he'd better move fast. 

"For you." He said, bowing and sweeping the flower forward in his outstretched hand. Marlene laughed softly, and took it. 

"Thank you." She said.

He smiled shyly. Lily sighed again. She took Marlene's arm. 

"Come one, let's go." She started to drag Marlene away. 

"Wait." Marlene said, stopping and turning back to Sirius. 

"Are you free around one on Saturday?" She asked. "We're going to Hogsmeade." 

"It would be my pleasure." Sirius responded. He took her hand and lightly kissed her fingertips. She giggled again. They stared at each other for a moment. 

Lily crossed her arms. 

"Are you quite finished?" She asked Marlene, who nodded. They walked away together. 

Sirius couldn't believe it. He'd done it. He'd finally won her over.

James came bounding over. "Dost mine eyes deceive me? Or was that Marlene McKinnon? The love of your life?" 

"Yes it was, and we've got a date." Sirius could hardly believe the words he was saying. 

"You owe me ten sickles." Remus informed James, who deflated immediately. "I told you he'd date Marlene before Lily would date you." 

James sighed and shoved his hand into his book bag. 

"Here." He shoved the coins into Remus' waiting hand. "Are you happy?" 

"Yes, actually." Remus replied, pocketing the coins. "I found the book." 

"Oh, thank Merlin, we were looking for that stupid thing all day. Where'd you find it?" James asked. 

"Snivellus had it." Remus responded. 

James swore. 

"You're joking. That idiot stole your book?" 

Remus shook his head. "It's a long story. But, I have it back now, so there's no need to get worked up about it." 

Sirius put a hand on Remus' shoulder. 

"Sure. If that's what you want." 

**** 

"We are so getting him back." James said. 

They were back in the Gryffindor common room. Sirius and Peter were sitting with James near the fire. Earlier, Remus had excused himself and headed toward the library for a late night study session. 

"No one messes with our friend and gets away with it," James said. "Especially not our dear pal Snivellus." 

"Oh, can it. You're just angry because we spent a whole morning looking for it, and then Remus found it on his own anyway." Sirius said. 

James huffed. "Fine. Maybe your right." 

"Just relax," Sirius said. "Like Remus said earlier, there's no need to get all worked up. After all, it was just a book." 

Sirius was tired from all the drama the day had entailed. He just wanted to sit back and stare at the fire, thinking about Marlene. 

"You should get some sleep," Peter suggested quietly. "It'll give you some time to think of something." 

"You're right. Plotting is always easier in dreams," James agreed, "But I'm still kicking his sorry behind." 

James yawned and stood up, stretching. "Good night, you lot." He said affectionately. Then he headed up the stairs. As he ascended, the stone steps turned into a slide, sending him tumbling back the the ground. Swearing loudly, James got to his feet. 

Sirius and Peter laughed uproariously. 

"Wrong staircase, idiot." Sirius said teasingly. 

James didn't responded. He just got to his feet, his face red. He turned on his heel and stormed up the right staircase, muttering to himself. 

Sirius turned to Peter, who was sitting next to him with a slight smile on his face. 

"You're a genius." He told Peter. Peter shrugged mildly. 

"I didn't do anything." He said. 

"You got him to go to sleep. That's genius in my book." Sirius replied. 

"Let's be realistic. Anything's genius in your book." 

****

Severus had just finished a late night of Remedial Potions with Professor Slughorn. He didn’t really need it. He just used it as time to spend where he couldn’t be mocked for anything, or teased by his so-called friends. 

He was walking back to class, late night hall pass in hand, when he saw something unusual. A figure was moving in the distance. They certainly didn’t appear to be a teacher. They walked silently in the moonlight, sometimes stopping and looking furtively behind them, as if they didn’t want to be seen. 

Severus decided to deviate from his path to the Slytherin Common Room and follow the mysterious figure. Although the figure didn’t stay mysterious for long. Severus waited, and then saw his face. 

It was Remus Lupin. Now what was the normally obedient, rule-following Gryffindor doing, snooping around in the dark? 

Severus followed him for a while, until in the darkness, he lost him. Remus must’ve ducked in a corridor and gotten away. He was quite slippery. Severus quickly realized he had no excuse for being in this wing of the castle, and quelling his curiosity, he quickly headed back to the Slytherin Common Room. 

Something was afoot, he knew for certain. Remus was… up to something. But what? Severus knew he didn’t have enough information. He’d have to keep on observing. Silently. Waiting for something, although he had no idea what. 

He stared up at the full moon. Maybe the answer was closer than he thought it was. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to clarify, Severus doesn't know that Remus is a werewolf, but Remus thinks that he does.


	4. (It's Not a Chapter)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, I've been a little busy lately, so that's why I haven't been writing as much. This week, I thought I might just write a little blurb, because I truly have a lot going on (thanks, college) so this is a little blurb, it's within the same fandom, but just know it's got NOTHING to do with the plot.

(A RANDOM SHORT BLURB)

Draco Malfoy got off the Hogwarts Express perturbed. He hated trains. He hated snobs. And he hated the color red. Not necessarily in that order.

A loud voice cut through the night air. "Firs' years!" Firs' years! This way, please! Follow me!" Draco looked up to see where the voice had come from. His eyes lifted to see what appeared to be a giant, hovering at least three feet above the rest of the crowd. He suspected immediately that the large man with the full, black beard was not a full wizard. Half giant, possibly. Scum of the earth, in Draco's not-so-humble opinion.

Grudgingly, he shoved his way along with the rest of the first years, following the huge man towards an inky colored lake.

"Well, into the boats now, you lot." The tall man said, waving his lantern. "Gon' be late for the feast."

Draco pushed his friend Crabbe aside, and stepped into the little boat gingerly. Water was not a favorite of his either. His parents had said this school was one of the best. He had never doubted them before, but he was starting to now. But as the boat steered itself easily across the lake, the children got a better view of the castle. And even Draco could not help but stare in awe.

It was a magnificent sight. Invisible before, it now exploded into view, each and every window alight with a yellow glow.

"Wow," Goyle said, as the others let out audible gasps.

"Oh, please," Draco said, in an attempt to downplay his sudden excitement. "I've seen better."

Goyle immediately followed his lead. "Yeah," he said. "Me too."

The boats arrived, and the half-giant led the group away from the boats and towards the castle. Soon, they crossed through the massive entrance and into Hogwarts. They congregated at the top of the stairs, where a woman in green robes appeared from behind two enormous wooden double doors.

"Welcome to Hogwarts, School of Witchcraft and Wizardry." She said. "I am Professor McGonagall. The Sorting Ceremony will begin soon. Wait here a moment." Then as fast as she appeared, she vanished behind the doors again.

Draco shoved his way to the front. He wanted to confirm something he'd heard on the train. A scrawny boy with dark hair and a lightning bolt scar on his forehead stood toward the front of the group. Draco approached him. "So it's true," He said loudly, catching everyone's attention. "Harry Potter is here at Hogwarts."

Immediately, whispers rang out through the crowd. Draco ignored them. Harry Potter was staring directly at him. It made Draco slightly uncomfortable.

"I'm Draco Malfoy," He said, introducing himself.

Then he turned to the red-headed boy next to him. "And you are?" He asked. Then he held up his hand. "Wait. Don't tell me. Red hair and a hand me down robe. You must be a Weasley."

He could feel Crabbe and Goyle smirking behind him. He ignored the obvious Weasley and turned his attention back to Harry.

"I hope you know who that is," He said, "Wouldn't want to go making friends with the wrong sort."

He stuck out his hand. "I can help you there."

Harry stood still for a second, looking first at his ginger haired friend, then down at Draco's hand. Finally, he met Draco's eyes.

"I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks."

Draco fumed. A retort was on the tip of his tongue, but at that exact moment, Professor McGonagall reappeared.

"We are ready for you. Before we begin, know this. Each of you will have the chance to prove yourselves. You will earn points for your house for excellent behavior, and you will lose points for disobedience. Behave honorably, and you will be rewarded. Disregard honor, and you will fall. Now, if you would follow me."

The doors to the Great Hall swung open, to reveal an awesome sight. The high ceiling appeared to be the night sky. Candles covered the ceiling, hanging with no strings. And eyes, hundreds of eyes followed the first years as they nervously entered the hall for the very first time.

Draco, distracted by the décor, had almost forgotten that Potter boy's insult. But not quite. His father had told him to be friends with power. From what Draco could see, the Potter boy had none. He only had an eye for aligning himself with the weak. He would make easy prey. If he was so much the celebrity, then, why, Draco thought it his responsibility to knock him down a few pegs. But that could wait for another night.

Professor McGonagall began calling out names. Draco watched as his fellow students were sorted. The Weasley entered Gryffindor, as easily as his brothers had. A girl named Hermione also was sorted into Gryffindor. As Draco had predicted, the addition to that house that led to the greatest applause was none other than Harry Potter.

His name was finally called.

"Malfoy, Draco."

He walked up to the stool, his heart pounding. What if he was too weak? What if he couldn't please his parents? He thought of the house Slytherin so hard, his head spun. 

The hat barely touched his head, before all his dreams came true. 

"SLYTHERIN!" It shouted. 

Draco breathed a silent sigh of relief. He was not a failure. His father would be proud. He grinned as he made his way towards his applauding house. 

This would be a new beginning for him. And he would not allow that Potter boy to steal any of his glory. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, thanks so much for reading. Lmk in the comments what you thought of this short lil blurb. Sorry I'm not giving you folks a Remus update, I really wish I could, but I just don't have the time. Also, lmk if you'd like this blurb to turn into a full blown fanfic. I'd love to write the Harry Potter series from Draco's POV. I think it'd really be fascinating. Love you all!


	5. Chapter 5: Hogsmeade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI I'M SO SORRY THIS IS A MIDWEEK POST but I feel bad for not posting for like three weeks, so SURPRISE! Also, all of my exams went pretty well, and my research paper is DONE so it's all good vibezzz! I hope you enjoy the chapter!

Sirius made it to Hogsmeade just on time. He rushed through the snow and in through the door of Three Broomsticks. His eyes found Marlene, settled in a corner table, near the window. Her face look flushed, like she had just stepped inside. Her eyes were sparking in the sunlight coming through the window. 

She looked beautiful. 

Sirius made his way over to her table, and sat down across from her. 

"You're late." A voice behind him said. 

Sirius turned around to find the fierce green eyes of Lily Evans staring back into his own. He should have known better. Of course this wasn't a date, he thought to himself. It's now an interrogation. 

Lily set the two butterbeers she had been carrying down on the table and sat down next to Marlene, who now looked slightly uncomfortable. 

"Well? What do you have to say for yourself?" Lily asked. 

Sirius' mouth opened, but no words came out. Luckily, Marlene saved him. 

"Lily, he's barely thirty seconds late. Lay off him." Marlene said. She turned to him. "You must be cold. Here, take this butterbeer." 

She slid the glass in front of her towards him. 

Sirius pushed it back. "It's alright. I can get my own." 

"No, I insist." Marlene said. "After all, we've already had the chance to warm up a bit." 

Lily glared at her. "We've barely been here for five minutes." 

Marlene sighed heavily, then looked back at Lily. For a moment, the tow girls seemed to have a conversation with their eyes. 

_Leave. You're making this awkward._

_No. I don't trust him._

_Please go. You're making things worse._

_He's the one who's going to make things worse!_

_It's just a trip to Hogsmeade for butterbeer. What's so bad about that?_

Finally, Lily seemed to give in. 

"I've got to- erm-" She gestured in the direction of the restrooms, then swiftly exited the scene. 

When her red hair was no longer visible, Sirius breathed an internal sigh of relief. He could finally talk to Marlene, without an aggressive ginger girls to ruin his chances. 

"I'm sorry about that." Marlene said. "Lily means well, but she can just be a bit-" 

"Aggressive? Off-putting? Hostile?" Sirius suggested. 

Marlene laughed. "Exactly. I'm sure she doesn't hate you, but to be honest, I think she dislikes anyone who associates themselves with James." 

Sirius smirked. "Maybe it's because she's got a little crush." 

Marlene scoffed. "Oh, I seriously doubt that." 

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Really? Let's see you put five galleons to that." 

Marlene grinned. "You're going to lose." 

"We'll see." 

Sirius took a sip of butterbeer. 

"What would you say if we got out of here?" He asked. He was anxious to escape the piercing green eyes of one Lily Evans. 

Marlene fidgeted nervously. "I'd like to, it's just-" 

Sirius sank back into his chair, attempting to hide his disappointment. 

"You don't want to abandon Lily." 

Marlene nodded apologetically. "She's been looking forward to this. I think she's been struggling lately and needed a break. So coming here..." Marlene's voice trailed off. 

Sirius took her hand gently. "You're a good friend." 

Marlene blushed slightly. "I try." 

"You're probably a better friend than me." 

Marlene raised an eyebrow. "Really?" 

"Yeah." 

There was silence for a moment. Sirius contemplated breaking it, but it was nice to have some quiet. His life was normally so chaotic. Granted, he was usually the one adding the chaos, but that was irrelevant. So he decided to think about his most recent problem. 

"Is something go on with Remus?" Marlene asked. 

Sirius looked up, surprised. It was like she had read his mind. 

"How did you know?" 

Marlene shrugged. "I'm perceptive." 

But their conversation did not continue, because Lily had returned from the restroom. She seemed more annoyed than she had been previously. Sirius was suddenly glad he had removed his hand from Marlene's. Lily looked three seconds away from hexing someone. 

Suddenly, an idea came into Sirius' head. His date with Marlene, if you could even call it that anymore, may not have been going as planned, but there was definitely a way to make it better. He could cheer up Lily, which would in turn get him closer to Marlene. 

Talk about working around the friendzone. 

"Come with me." Sirius said, getting to his feet. 

Lily looked up, surprised. "Both of us?" 

Sirius nodded. "Yeah. I have an idea. 

Their chairs scraped as they stood up and left Three Broomsticks. 

"So, masterful idea man," Marlene said, looping her arm through Sirius'. "Where are we going?" 

Sirius smiled. "You'll see." 

They spent the next breathless two hours stopping at every spot in Hogsmeade. At Zonko's, Lily and Marlene giggled over the love potions, which slightly terrified Sirius. But that didn't stop him from buying Marlene one before they left. 

"I want to give it as a gift to a friend of mine." She clarified. 

He also spotted the latest bag of joke tricks, which he sneakily purchased when Lily wasn't looking. They stopped by Honeydukes, where Sirius discovered Marlene's love of Sugar Quills. 

"I love to nibble on the ends while I'm working on my homework late at night," Marlene told him. "It gives me that extra energy boost." 

Sirius pulled two of the quills out of their jar. 

"You're so weird." Sirius told her, sticking two sugar quills up the side of his mouth, like a vampire. 

Marlene laughed. "Those ones are yours now." 

When they returned to the castle, both Lily and Marlene seemed in high spirits. Sirius started to think this day might not have been so bad after all, when Peter came tumbling down the hallway, looking panicked. 

"Sirius!" He said, grinding to a halt and breathing hard. "There you are. I've been looking all over for you." 

Sirius took Peter by the shoulders. "What's wrong?" He asked. 

"It's James," Peter said. "He's done something." 

All Sirius's problems came flooding back to him. He remembered his fight with Remus. He remembered James' anger... 

He looked at Marlene, an apologetic expression on his face. "I have to go." 

She smiled softly, then pulled him into a hug. 

"Thank you," She whispered into his ear. "You really made Lily's day. And mine." 

Sirius couldn't help but grin, even though he knew a crisis was about to unfold. 

"Anytime, Marlene." He replied, as she let go. 

Marlene started to walk away, when she noticed Lily hadn't moved. 

"Are you coming?" She asked. 

Whatever happiness Lily may have felt moments ago, it had evaporated. Lily now wore a stony glare. 

"No. Go on ahead. I'll meet you later." 

Marlene hesitated. "Are you sure?" 

"Positive." 

Marlene walked away, looking back a few times. She finally disappeared into the castle. Lily turned to Peter. 

"Where is he?" She asked. 

"Why should I tell you?" Peter replied. 

"Yeah," Sirius added. "In fact, since when do you care about what James is up to? I thought you hated him." 

"Oh, I do," Lily said. "and I have no intention of saving that git from some crisis he got himself into. I'm planning on finding him, and then kicking his sorry ass." 

"What did James ever do to you?" Sirius asked, slightly annoyed. He didn't like it when other people said they'd like to kick one of his friend's ass. Maybe Lily hadn't been worth his entire afternoon. 

She whirled on him. "None of your business, Black." She said. 

Sirius raised his eyebrows. "Oh. So now we're back on last name basis. I see how it is, Evans." 

"Fine. If Peter isn't willing to help, I can find him myself." She said. Then she stalked away, the same direction Marlene had come from. 

Sirius decided to let the matter rest. He had an idiot to save from himself. Normally, he would've been the idiot. But he'd gotten distracted. 

He turned to Peter. 

"Let's go." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JUST TO CLARIFY, this fic doesn't ship Sirius and Lily. He was just trying to make Lily happier so that Marlene would like him more. Great motivations, huh? Anyway, sorry that I haven't been posting as much. I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Comments and kudos legit make my day every time I see them! Have a good week everybody!


	6. James' Revenge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMGOSH this very well may be the longest chapter I've ever written! Insane. I'm impressed, especially because I've been SO BUSY. But I've managed to get out a regular update for you guys/gals/non-binary pals!   
> I hope you enjoy the chapter (hehehe)

Sirius followed Peter until he realized they were standing in front of the men's bathroom. 

"Seriously, Peter?" Sirius asked. "You couldn't hold it till we got to James?" 

Peter stuttered. "Sirius, I don't need to use the loo. James is in here." 

Sirius pushed past Peter, pulling out his wand and walking in the doors. As he took a step forward, something cold touched his foot. He looked down and watched water seep into his shoe. 

It was all over the floor. About an inch of it. It got deeper as the bathroom floors were slightly angled downward. He sloshed his way through the water, but it was still dark. 

" _Lumos."_ He whispered. He stopped walking, holding his wand up in the air, looking around. 

"James?" He called out. He waited for a moment, and then he heard something. There were soft crying noises coming from the wash area. He recognized them immediately. 

Sirius starting running, the water no longer on his mind. Then he saw something that made him stop. 

There was blood in the water. Long lines of it, stretching out from a singular body that lay motionless on the floor. It took him a moment to recognize who it was, mostly because it was covered in large cuts. It was Severus. James was several feet from him, on his knees, the bloody water pooling around him, sobbing. 

"Oh God," Sirius whispered. He crouched near Severus, and put his ear to his chest. He was still alive. Barely. 

He stood up from his crouching position and went over to James, kneeling in front of him. 

"What did you do?" He whispered. The horrifying scene was having trouble registering in his brain. He couldn't believe it. James would never do something like this. 

"It was an accident," James croaked, his voice hoarse from crying. "I found him here, holding some book and crying. I was so angry I- I wasn't thinking. I snatched the book out of his hands. He pulled his wand out and tried to get the book back. We started to fight. I slide underneath a stall, hiding. I was desperate and angry. So I opened the book, looking for something that might help. There was a spell in the corner. So I-" James' look at him. Sirius could see the shame. 

"I used it." He continued. "I had no idea what it would do. Next thing I know, Snape is on the floor, and there's blood everywhere. I panicked. So I screamed Peter's name- he had been my lookout, and he came running in. I told him to find you. I didn't mean to do it Sirius, I would never-" 

He stopped talking, and his eyes moved downwards to Severus. 

"I wouldn't, Sirius. Not even to him." 

Sirius was silent. He couldn't process this. It was too similar to things his parents had probably done. It was a nasty spell, probably created by someone who had way too much time on his hands, and a flair for murder. 

"I know," He told James. Then he looked at Peter. 

"Go get McGonagall. Now." He told him. 

It took a moment for Peter to process, but he nodded and ran hastily out of the bathroom. 

Sirius grabbed James' hand.

"Get up." He said. 

James stood up shakily. 

They both stood, staring at the body. 

"What are we going to do?" James asked quietly. 

Sirius whirled. "No. You mean what are _you_ going to do? I told you to leave it alone. It was just a book! But you took it too far. Remus even TOLD you he didn't want you to do anything. But no. When it comes to Snape, you just can't leave it alone! And now there's BLOOD all over the floor because you DIDN'T LISTEN!" 

Sirius normally would have never blown up at James like this. But as much as James cared about Remus, Sirius cared more. He cared enough that he would listen, and respect his wishes, no matter how much he would have wanted to give Severus a bloody nose. This time, James had gone too far. 

James stared at Severus, as if he couldn't believe his own eyes. 

"I'm a horrible human being." He whispered. "I may have very well just killed someone." 

"Yes, because of a BLOODY BOOK!" Sirius was nearly shouting now. James had really scared him. He'd always thought he'd be able to separate his ideas of his family from his friends, but the lines were blurring. 

"IT WASN'T HARMLESS!" James had finally raised his voice now. He seemed more angry than shocked. "Remus was really upset!" 

Sirius huffed. "Listen, I care about him too! But you went too far!" 

"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT." James protested. 

"THAT DOESN'T MATTER." Sirius yelled. "It's still just as bad as if you had done it on purpose! You know better than to just shoot random spells at people! Especially one you've never heard of before!" 

"You're one to lecture me. You're just as reckless as I am!" 

Sirius scoffed. "Oh really? Tell me, would I duel Severus in a bathroom and MURDER HIM?" 

"He's not dead!" James protested. "Or at least- I mean-" 

"Silence!" A new voice entered the room. Peter had returned, but not alone. Standing beside him was Professor McGonagall, and someone Sirius hadn't been expecting. Lily Evans was standing to her left. Sirius could practically hear James' heart pounding. 

"Mr. Potter, what on earth have you done? Professor McGonagall asked, her voice shaking with barely disguised horror and shock. 

Sirius scooped up the book and handed the soaking wet thing to her. 

"He used a spell on Severus." 

"Mr. Black, I am very aware of that fact, but could you please specify?" 

It was then that James decided to speak up. 

"Sectumsempra." James whispered, his head hung low. 

The reaction was unanimous. No one knew what the spell was. Even Professor McGonagall looked as confused as the rest of them. It was very clear what it did, but Sirius had never even heard of it before. Lily was the only one who showed slight signs of recognition, but they were so slight that Sirius convinced himself that they hadn't really been there. It was unlikely that Lily knew what the spell was if even McGonagall was stumped. And he was absolutely positive that James hadn't either. Otherwise he wouldn't have been such a dumbass. 

"I've never heard of that spell." Professor McGonagall said. 

"I have." 

Everyone turned to look at Lily. Sirius was shocked. Maybe he should listen to his instincts more, instead of just dismissing them. 

"What?" Professor McGonagall said, the surprise evident in her face. 

"I've heard that spell before, Professor. But more importantly, I know the reverse incantation. Please, let me heal him." 

Professor McGonagall was silent. Sirius knew she was probably debating the options in her mind. Trust a student, or let someone die. He was about the speak, but Lily got there before him. 

"Professor," Lily said. "If you do not let me reverse this now, he will die. He's been here too long." 

Professor McGonagall looked at Lily. Lily's eyes were fierce and unyielding. 

"Alright." She relented. "I know of nothing else we can do." 

In a flash, she was all business again. 

"Potter, follow me to my office please. Pettigrew, return to the dormitory. Black, when Lily- when Lily finishes, help her bring Severus to the hospital wing. And make sure this bathroom is cleaned. Not a word of this to anyone." 

Immediately, Lily rushed to Severus' side. Sirius stood mute as he watched James and Peter exit with McGonagall. He had no idea why he was still here. Part of him wanted to support James, and help him explain that it was an accident. Part of him wanted to abandon him and go with Peter back to the dormitory. But no part of him wanted to be standing here in this bathroom any longer. 

He didn't have a choice, however. Instead, he watched Lily kneeling over Severus' body. She pulled out her wand and began muttering a long string of word, waving her wand in large, slow, sweeping movements over Severus' limp form. Sirius was still, and as he watched, he began to see the large cuts fade away. 

Only the blood on the floor remained. 

Lily was breathless by the time all of the cuts disappeared. The spell was long and endless, and to Sirius, it had sounded like a repeated chant over and over again. He exhaled in relief. Their least favorite person on the planet would not die today. 

"Thank you." He said. "You're amazing." 

Lily looked at him. "I didn't do it for him. Or James. And certainly not you." 

Sirius nodded. "I understand." 

They nothing more to each other, simply muttering the vanishing spell, _Evansco,_ as they waved all the blood and water away. Sirius picked up the sopping wet book and dried it with his wand. He shoved it into his robe when Lily wasn't looking. Then, they carried Severus silently through an empty hall, one of his arms swung over each of their shoulders. Sirius silently praised McGonagall for her ability to erase any crowd. He was glad that no one would see him and Lily with essentially what appeared to be a dead student's body over their shoulders. Once they had soothed a panicked Madame Pomfrey and lifted Severus onto a hospital wing bed, Sirius took his leave. Lily stayed. 

He didn't go back to the Gryffindor Common Room immediately. Gossip traveled faster than a Quidditch match game between Hufflepuff and Gryffindor ended, and Sirius wasn't keen to answer three million questions at once. 

So he went to the courtyard again. Where all of the drama began. He suddenly became nostalgic for a time when his friend wasn't almost a murderer. Unintentional murderer, but still, a murderer. 

He pulled the book out of his robes. He'd never been one for reading, especially when it came to school, but he figured that this was for a good purpose. It was a copy of _Advanced Potion Making._ He rifled through the pages. The book was very beat up and battered. The pages were covered in quill-inked notes scattered all over them. They related to the potions, and sometimes, there were spells, like the one that James had used. Made up, all of them. Sirius had never heard of a singular one before. This book had been well-loved, to say the least. 

Finally, Sirius found what he had been searching for. In one of the dog-eared pages, was the name of the spell that had led to the events of the day. 

_Sectumsempra._

And underneath it; 

_For enemies._

Sirius almost laughed, but it wasn't funny. Had James not seen those words? Or had he just chosen to ignore them. Sirius thought that the first might be more plausible, seeing as James was a bloody fool who didn't think things through. Then again, he was one to talk. He stuffed the book bag into his robes and returned to the Gryffindor Common Room. Oddly, no one spoke a word as they watched him enter through the portrait hall. Sirius mentally shrugged it off, and went to go claim the largest red armchair near the fire. As he stared into the flames, he thought about the book. Who could be the owner? There had been no hints, no name, except for a stupid nickname written on the inside cover. Sirius scoffed. _The Half-Blood Prince._ He'd never known a man, or woman, who was that proud of their blood line. Except, of course, his family. And most Slytherins. Okay, so maybe that was an over exaggeration. It would have been much more helpful to him if a name had been scrawled there instead of a ridiculous, egotistic nickname. The owner must have thought they were so _clever._

"Sirius!" A familiar voice hit his ears. "Why the bloody hell doesn't anyone tell me anything?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so now that you've read it, I know everyone's going to attack me like "the same thing happened in HP #6! You stole a scene from JK Rowling!" Yeah, I know. I just thought it'd be cooler this way. Plus, it was fun for me to write, so I hope it was just as fun to read. Thank you SO MUCH for over four hundred views, I'm very very happy! You guys are the best, comments and kudos literally make my day every time I see them! Stay safe and as always, thanks for reading! New update the Sunday after this one! :) And after my semester ends, I'll probably update more because I'll have more time!


	7. Conversations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI! I'm sorry I disappeared off the face of the planet for like so long!   
> I had a lot going on for a lot longer than I thought! To make up for it though, I've got a super long update for you! And heads up, it is like non-stop angst, so be prepared for that. I missed you guys so much! Regular updates will resume from here on out, I promise. Life had just been a struggle recently, that's all. I hope you enjoy reading the chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Ch. 7 

Severus opened his eyes, and was almost blinded by the light in the room. He blinked wearily. His entire body felt like it had been seared on a barbecue grill, and then glued back together again. In other words, he felt like shit. His eyes slowly adjusted, and as he took in his surroundings, he realized where he was. Tall, sloped ceilings. Large windows. Uncomfortable bed. 

The hospital wing. 

He tried to remember how he had gotten here. But all his brain provided him with was an image of blood,  _ his blood,  _ covering black and white tile. 

How on earth was he not dead? 

Suddenly, he realized he was not alone. He hadn’t shifted his position that much, but he could still see a woman sitting beside his bed. Her red hair gave her away. She seemed so relaxed. She even had a magazine in her hands. She just sat there, reading. Severus didn’t want to ruin her peace, but he knew he couldn’t avoid what was coming. 

“Lily.” He tried to speak. But his voice was hoarse, like he had not drunk any water in days. He coughed, to clear his throat, then tried again. 

“Lily.” 

This time she heard him. Piercing green eyes met his with a stony stare. 

“I’m not talking to you.” She said, turning back to her magazine. 

“Then why are you here?” 

She looked up. The thwap of the magazine hit his chest before he realized what had happened. 

“Ouch.” He said aloud, smiling weakly into her glaring eyes.

“You scared me. You utter and complete pain in the arse. Why would you do that?” 

Severus grinned. 

“I didn’t do anything.” 

Lily huffed angrily.

“Don’t play dumb! James doesn’t just attack someone without a reason.” 

“Are you sure about that?” 

She got to her feet, throwing the magazine on the chair. Severus had never seen her this angry. Maybe she truly did care about him. Maybe there was still a chance. 

“Just tell me what you did.” Lily said. 

Severus groaned as he tried to pull himself up to a sitting position. His entire body revolted, and he felt like puking.

“Fine. You really want to know?” He asked, pushing back the urge to projectile vomit the contents of his empty stomach on the floor.

She was silent. 

“I stole a book.” 

She scoffed. “Wow.” 

“Not on purpose! It just fell out of a bag.” 

“Whose?” She asked. 

He had to pause and steady himself, even though he literally hadn’t moved from the bed. Silently, he vowed never to design another spell again.

“Remus’s. Apparently it was important because next thing I know, Potter is using one of my own spells on me in a bathroom!” 

Lily seemed to finally notice how uncomfortable he was. 

“Sit back, stop shifting so much.” She adjusted his pillow, and suddenly his world of pain became more bearable. He relaxed. 

She sat back down again, at his side.

“Thank you.” He told her. 

“You never should have designed that spell.” She said. 

Immediately, Severus defended himself. Apparently, their harmony could last no longer than a few seconds.

“I didn’t know it was ever going to be used! Obviously I didn’t plan on Potter finding my book, or using that spell!” 

Silence filled the room. There was a tension larger and much more breakable than their shared secret. 

“You’re lucky that I even saved you.” 

Severus’ eyes widened. She had saved him? It made sense, but at the same time, it didn’t. He’d done something unforgivable in her eyes. Something worse than stealing a book. Why would she have shown him mercy? 

“Really? You have nothing to say?” 

He realized he hadn’t responded to her. What to say? How to remedy an irreparable wound?

“I’m sorry-” 

Lily held up her hand. 

“Stop. You and I both know that it is much too late for that.” 

He did know. But he had wanted to try anyway. 

“Why did you save me?” He asked. 

“James is very loyal. You shouldn’t have messed with his friend. But no one, not even you, deserves to die.” 

He shifted in his sheets. 

“You should’ve let me.” He said. 

“But I didn’t.” 

He raised his head to look at her. “Why?” 

“I already said! James-” 

“So now this is about him?” 

Lily reeled back, but her eyes still burned with stubbornness and anger. 

“You didn’t let me finish.” She said. 

Severus shrugged. “I don’t think I need to. You’ve made your position clear.”

“But not before you decided whose side you were on.” She retorted. 

Severus laughed. “There are no sides, Lily. Nothing is about sides. The lines are blurry.” 

“James crossed a line. One that I thought mattered to him. But the only reason he did is because of you.” 

“I see.” Severus said. “Turn it on the victim.” 

Lily turned away, which in itself, was an answer.

“Yes.” 

“Why?” Severus asked. 

She whirled on him. Severus was amazed to discover that he still found her beautiful, even when she was furiously angry at him. 

“Let’s play a game.” She snapped. “One word, made of two.” 

“I wish I’d never said it.” Severus whispered. 

Lily glared at him. 

“I don’t. Because it showed me who you really are.” 

Severus raised an eyebrow. How bold of her, to assume she knew who he was. They may have been friends, but he’d always kept his distance in the past. But he was curious. 

“Oh really?” He asked. “ Then who am I?” 

“A coward.” She spat, but all Severus could see was her hair. It looked like fire. “A coward who slips into the darkness in order to hide his own weakness and insecurities. Who lashes out against anything that hurts his pride.” 

“Then what would you call James?” He asked. 

She fell silent. Then she stormed out of the room, slamming the enormous doors in her wake. Severus wanted to smile. He had gotten the last word. But his heart sobbed, for he had just lost his best, and only, friend in the entire world. 

**** 

“Sirius!” Remus thundered through the portrait hole. He was furious. He didn’t even notice all the eyes on him when he entered. “Why the bloody hell doesn’t anyone tell me anything?” 

He saw Sirius rise up from the best red chair by the fire. 

“Remus.” He said. And then Remus saw it. Something different in his eyes. 

Fear. And anxiety. 

Remus suddenly became aware of his surroundings. The Common Room that was normally so loud had become very quiet. All eyes were watching him. Waiting for the storm to unfold.

“Not here.” Sirius said. 

“Fine.” Remus replied. “But we’re having this conversation now. So, where to?” 

**** 

It took approximately an hour for Sirius to relive the trauma. And once he had finished his story, Remus felt himself feeling a strange new feeling. Undulated, potent rage. 

“Why? What on earth was he thinking?” Remus asked. His anger had been misdirected, so now he was trying to assure Sirius that it wasn’t towards him. 

“He wasn’t.” Sirius replied, the ache evident in his voice. 

“Clearly!” Remus snapped. “Let me see the book.” 

Sirius shoved his hand into his robes, and gave it to him. Remus ran his finger down the spine. This book was old. Must’ve been lying around for ages. He opened it, to find inky scrawls covering every inch of each page. Folded corners abounded. He lifted each one methodically until he found what he was looking for. 

_ Sectumsempra.  _

Underneath that word, it read, 

_ For enemies.  _

He looked up at Remus.  __

“This spell. I’ve never heard of it before.” He said. 

“No one has.” Sirius told him. “Even our dear Minnie was stumped.” 

“Do you know what that means?” Remus said. 

Sirius nodded. “Yes. Someone invented it.” 

“How has this not been confiscated?” Remus asked. 

Sirius shrugged. “They never found it. Until now. I’m supposed to return it to McGonagall today.” 

He reached out his hand.

“Wait.” Remus set his hand on Sirius’ wrist. “Please. Let me have it.” 

They looked at each other for a long moment, until Sirius must’ve decided to trust him. 

“Damn you and your beautiful brown eyes.” Sirius said. “Alright. You can have it. If you don’t mind me asking, what exactly are you going to do with it?” 

Remus stared down at it. “I haven’t decided yet.” 

**** 

Sirius was alone in the Gryffindor Common Room again. Not exactly. There were people all around. But he still felt alone. He was thinking through his conversation with Remus earlier. This entire day had been so heavy for him. He hadn’t seen James, or Peter, all day. He understood why James might try to avoid him, but Peter? That made no sense. 

So he’d just been staring into the fire for hours. Slowly, people started to trickle up the stairs. Finally, he actually was alone. 

“Sirius?” 

A familiar voice hit his ears. He turned around to see Marlene descending the staircase that led up to the Girl’s Dormitory. She had a large blanket around her shoulders, and looked like she had just risen from bed. 

“It’s late.” She said. “I was worried about you. I didn’t see you in the Great Hall. Or anywhere, really.” 

“‘Sorry. I’ve just been here.” Sirius replied. 

She walked towards him and sat on the end of the couch nearest to the armchair he was currently occupying. 

“What are you doing here?” He asked her. 

“Oh. Well, I’d been studying for hours, after dinner. Next thing I knew, I woke up. I had fallen asleep. Ink all over my notes. And me.” She laughed. “So I cleaned up, then I remembered I’d left some of my stuff down here. I came down to get it, but then I found you.” 

Sirius smiled halfheartedly. So Marlene wasn’t perfect after all. That hardly mattered. He didn’t care. She was still everything he’d envisioned in a girl. 

“I know we’ve only gone on one date, but I’ve noticed something about you.” She said, looking up at him. 

“Oh yeah?” He asked, “What is it?” 

“You’re a puzzle.” She said. “So many pieces, that you’ve lost yourself somewhere in the process. So you try to put yourself back together. But you keep losing. And the puzzle gets harder and harder to solve.” 

Sirius tucked a loose strand of hair back behind her ear. “So tell me, would you like to go on another date with this puzzle? Or maybe three? Or four?” 

She laughed. “Maybe. We’ll have to see.” 

Sirius smiled. “Alright. I’ll take a maybe. But I do want to know. What’s holding you back?” 

Marlene suddenly had trouble meeting his eyes. 

“I heard rumors.” She said. 

Sirius looked at her. He shouldn’t have been surprised. McGonagall had shut down an entire hallway route so that no one would know. So naturally, the entire school did. 

“Don’t believe everything you hear.” Sirius muttered. 

“But is it true?” She asked, sitting up taller. “Did James almost kill Severus?” 

It became Sirius’ turn to avoid making eye contact. “I don’t want to talk about it.” 

Marlene huffed. “I understand that. But you abandoned me at the end of our date. I think the least I deserve is the truth.”

Sirius sighed. She was, of course, right. He hadn’t been fair to her. Even though he knew it wasn’t his fault, he tried to imagine it from Marlene’s perspective. He saw himself walk away, apologies trailing behind. So he decided to head in what he was hoping was the right direction.

“Fine. If you really want to know, yes, it is true.” 

She reached across the chair, setting her hand on top of his. “Are you okay?” 

Sirius looked at her. “You know what’s funny? No one’s asked me that. Ever since this whole thing began.” 

He stood up, pacing the room, trying to think of an answer.

“And to be honest with you, I don’t know. I mean, I've always been so fucked up on the inside, but James? Everyone sees him as some kind of masterpiece. And I’m just his loud, sarcastic, fun loving side kick. So walking in that room- seeing him, in a position I’d never thought I’d see him in before-” A sob escaped from somewhere deep inside of him. “Marlene, he was crying. There was blood everywhere, there was a body, and he was crying.” 

Great shudders went through him, in between violent sobs of distress. Sirius had thought that James was safe. That he would never see any part of his family inside of him. But he had been wrong. 

Marlene stood and pulled him underneath her blanket. He buried his head into her shoulder, enveloping himself in her warmth.

“Shhh.” She whispered. “It’s okay. You’re going to be alright. I’ve got you.” 

**** 

Remus found James standing alone in a hallway. His fury overwhelmed him, and he crossed the room and dragged James roughly towards a nearby empty classroom. Slamming the door, he rounded on his well-meaning, stupid, arrogant friend.

“JAMES, YOU’RE A BLOODY IDIOT.” He yelled. It was a strange sensation. He’d never found himself angry enough to yell before. But it was different this time. 

“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry?” For once in his life, James was not the first to yell. Remus would’ve been proud of him, if he hadn’t been so fucking furious. 

Remus scoffed. “I DON’T KNOW. MAYBE UNTIL YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL THAT SOMEONE ALMOST DIED.” 

James paused for a moment, appearing to consider his next words, but completely undermining that theory in two seconds. 

“Well, if you think about it, I kind of would’ve done us a favor…” 

Remus almost smacked him. He couldn’t believe that James had suddenly decided to take the route into moral ambiguity. Maybe he was just deflecting.  _ No,  _ thought Remus,  _ He’s always deflecting. He needs to take accountability for his actions NOW.  _

“Unbelievable.” Remus was no longer yelling, mostly due to the fact that he couldn’t believe James’ audacity. “You don’t feel any remorse? None at all?” 

James’ eyes dropped. The inability to make eye contact, or respond, told Remus that James was still blocking off his feelings. But Remus wanted to push harder. 

“It was a book. You almost murdered him because of a book.” 

He had dropped the word  _ murder.  _ Maybe that would elicit some response. 

James instantly became defensive. 

“I didn’t know what that spell would do!” He protested. 

“THAT DOESN’T MATTER!” Remus was back to yelling. He cared about James. He didn’t want to destroy everything they had worked for. Friendship. Loyalty. Brotherhood. 

“How could it not matter?” James asked, frustrated. “Look at me! Do you see any signs that I actually wanted to kill him? I just wanted to make him suffer! He hurt you.” 

Remus had no response to that. No one had ever wanted to fight for him before. No one besides James, Sirius, and Peter.

“He hurt you,” James repeated, “and I didn’t want to see you in any more pain.” 

Remus softened. How could he mount a defense against that? James was an arrogant, egotistic dumbass friend, but he was Remus’ arrogant, egotistic dumbass friend. 

“Okay.” Remus said. “Okay, I understand. But I had the book back. I had it back. And I said, I specifically told you, do not go after him. I didn’t want you to act against him. But what did you do?” 

James lowered his head, ashamed. “I almost killed him.” 

The word  _ killed  _ re-ignited Remus’ anger. 

“EXACTLY. Whether it was intentional or not, you didn’t listen. And you’ve blown a minor incident into one of major proportions. Sirius-” Remus paused. “Sirius told me how he found you. You already know what his past was like. He doesn’t need any more trauma! And Peter! He’s sensitive! The whole school now thinks we’re friends with an attempted murderer.” 

James’ eyes hardened. He looked like he wanted to hit something, but instead, he ended up doing something that Remus thought was much worse. 

“Then I guess we shouldn’t be friends.” He said. He opened the door and left the room, leaving Remus standing by himself. 

“I guess so.” Remus muttered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Again, I apologize for sporadic updates constantly. I'll try and get a better handle on this. I love and appreciate you guys/gals/nb pals so much!


	8. Angela

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I am so sorry for the inconsistency clearly I cannot keep my promises! But I have been trying to write as much as I can and I've been sort of pre-occupied of late. Also, apologies that this is literally in the middle of the week. I hope you enjoy it though and I will try my absolute hardest to get back to a regular schedule! Thank you so much for reading and 688 views!

Ch. 8 Angela 

It had been a week since Remus had spoken to James. And although James and Remus weren’t speaking, Remus had convinced a reluctant Sirius to tell him how James was handling the rumors. 

“He hasn’t been sleeping well,” Sirius told him. “But you would already know that since he’s in the bed next to yours.” 

Remus had nodded his thanks and left. He had already known that. Several times, Remus had woken up due to James’ whimpers, and occasionally screams. Silently, he thought to himself,  _ I know how you feel.  _ But still, he did nothing. 

Working through his turmoil of emotions took awhile. And it would’ve taken much longer if he hadn’t had Lily. Lily was an amazing friend. Remus could see the exact reasons that James liked her so much. She was intelligent, but equally compassionate. She was a great listener, and she had given Remus some of the best advice he’d ever gotten. 

“Listen. James has a lot of pride. It’s evident in his every-day manner, even in his walk! Don’t get me wrong, I despise him, but I like to understand people. And from what I understand, you definitely hurt his pride. So whenever you two decide to make up, don’t pick at an old wound. There’s a time and a place for a rebuke. But there is also a time and a place where loyal friendship matters more than past anger.” 

Remus was starting to think that Lily was much more observant than she let on, or maybe she did have a crush on his best friend. She may not recognize it, but there was something about James. Something more to him than his arrogance and pride. Something that Remus had seen as best-friend material, and Lily might see as boyfriend material. But he decided to let the matter drop. 

“Thank you. For everything. Listening to me ramble about my problems. Making sure I eat. Etcetera.” Remus said. 

Lily smiled, then ruffled his hair affectionately. “Of course. James would be nothing without his best man.” 

Remus smirked. “Oh, I don’t think I’m his best man. Sirius might be, though.” 

Lily raised an eyebrow, then shook her head. “Don’t count yourself out. I think you’re more valuable than you know.” 

****

*the day of the incident* 

James followed McGonagall up the stairs and into her office. He sat down in the chair opposite of her, his heart pounding in his chest. He gripped both wooden armrests nervously. 

For what felt like an hour, there was silence. Professor McGonagall sat across from him, staring at him reproachfully, while James looked fixedly at the floor. 

“Have a biscuit, Potter.” 

James looked up, shocked. Of all of the things she could have said. 

“A biscuit, Potter. Take one.” 

Hesitantly, he reached out and took one from the silver platter on her desk. His stomach felt hollow and empty, so instead of taking a bite, he turned it around in his hands. 

Professor McGonagall leaned back in her chair. 

“Never, in all my years of teaching here, has such an incident crossed my path.” Her voice was quiet, but there was thinly veiled anger in it, mixed with disappointment. “Give me one reason why you shouldn’t be expelled.” 

“It was an accident.” James blurted out. The words came to him before he could stop them. “I didn’t know what that spell would do. And-” 

He paused for a moment. “And I’m sorry.”

He looked Professor McGonagall in the eye, hoping he was somehow transferring the remorse he felt. Professor McGonagall sighed, and took a loose leaf of parchment and wrote something that James couldn’t see. She handed it to him. 

“Detention, Potter.” She said, “For three months. You will report to Professor Flitwick and assist him in his needs every day after classes have finished.” 

James felt like he could breathe again. “Thank you-” 

“I’m not finished, Potter.” She interrupted. “Your Quidditch privileges are to be revoked. You will not be attending, or playing in the Slytherin versus Gryffindor game this coming weekend.” 

“What?” James spluttered. Professor McGonagall knew how much he valued Quidditch. “You’re joking.” 

Professor McGonagall met his eyes sternly. “No, I am afraid I’m quite serious.” 

James fumed. He was so angry, he didn’t even snicker at Professor McGonagall’s unintentional pun. He wanted to throw his biscuit on the ground, storm off, and slam the door behind him, but he respected McGonagall too much. So instead of doing any of those things, he reluctantly accepted his fate in silence.

“You may go now, Potter.” McGonagall said. 

James nodded politely, and exited the room, shutting the door behind him. Inside him, anger was building. McGonagall knew how much he valued Quidditch. He’d especially been looking forward to kicking O’Malley, the Slytherin seeker’s arse. He felt like throwing something. Something breakable. The first thing he saw when he reached his bedroom was a tiny glass cat figurine. He snatched it and chucked it against the wall. It shattered into a million little pieces. 

“Oi!” Peter rolled over in his bed, distraught. “That was my lucky cat! My grandfather made it for me!” 

“Sorry.” James said sullenly. “I’ll clean it up.” 

He could see Peter ready to rebuke him more, but then he must’ve changed his mind once he looked at James’ expression. 

“It’s alright. Papa’s made millions of ‘em. I can probably get another once I go back there for summer holiday. Anyways, what’s got you so riled up?” 

“McGonagall.” James responded. “I’ve got three months of detention, and to make matters worse, I can’t play Quidditch.” 

Peter sat up a little straighter. “You’re joking. What about the match next week?” 

“I can’t play.” James slumped on his bed. “Or attend.” 

“But it’s against Slytherin!” Peter cried out. “It’s one of the most important ones of the season!” 

“I know!” James groaned. “Don’t remind me.” 

“Merlin, what are we going to do?” Peter said, half to himself. 

“I’ll have to tell Angela.” James said glumly. “She’ll be furious.” 

“Who’ll be furious?” 

Sirius Black had arrived, looking slightly disheveled. He was carrying a book in his hand, but as soon as he glanced at James, he tucked it out of sight guiltily. 

James didn’t respond, leaving Peter to fill the awkward silence. 

“Angela.” He said. “James has got himself banned from the match next week.” 

“Bloody hell!” Sirius exclaimed. “McGonagall’s gone mental! Everyone knows you’re the star player!” 

“She’s not mental.” James said. “She’s just-” 

He couldn’t find the words, so he decided to let that statement hang in the air. Sirius shifted his feet uncomfortably.

“Well, the only reason I came up here is because dinner’s soon,” He said. “So we best get a move on.” 

Peter stood, already wearing his shoes. He joined Sirius at the door. James didn’t move. He wasn’t hungry. His untouched biscuit was still shoved into the pockets of his robes, probably a mess of crumbs now. 

“You coming?” Peter asked him. 

“No. You go ahead.” 

Peter and Sirius looked at each other, then Sirius shrugged. They both left the room, the door slightly ajar. He laid back on his bed, hands behind his head. Staring at the ceiling, he wondered how on earth he was going to tell Angela that he couldn’t play. He couldn’t very well say, “ _ I can’t play the match because I almost murdered Snivellus in the bathroom.”  _ For a few minutes, James laid there and tried to come up with some kind of idea. Eventually, he gave up, mostly due to the fact that his stomach was growling. He made his way downstairs and through the hallways to the Great Hall, from which there was still chatter emanating. Not wanting to be stared at by the entire population of Hogwarts, he grasped the door handle gently and pulled the door open as quietly as he could. 

Unfortunately, his attempts at a subtle late entrance failed completely. He’d almost made it to the Gryffindor table with minimal eyes watching him, when Angela decided to ruin his plan. 

“POTTER!” She yelled, rising to her feet. 

Immediately, everyone in the hall fell silent. If few eyes had met his before, James was absolutely sure that every eye was on him now. He heard a few Slytherins, including Snivellus, snickering in the corner. His heart thumped in his chest. Contrary to popular opinion, he did not like to be the center of attention all the time. Especially when what he was the center of attention for was accidental murder. Angela looked around, annoyed. 

“What’re you all staring at him for? Mind your own business!” She waved her hands and stared down anyone who refused to stop looking. Gradually the hall returned to its normal chatter level. But James knew he wasn’t in the clear. Angela was making her way toward him now, and she did not look happy. 

Angela had been crowned Captain of the Quidditch team at fifteen, making huge leaps as the first female Quidditch Captain of Gryffindor, and the youngest. At first, her team and the other Gryffindors had underestimated her, but the fiery redhead soon had them cheering her name in the stands after she’d led them through two championships in a row. Her eyes were blue, a unique feat of the genetics of her American and Irish parents. She was known for her loud, overbearing presence and her bold personality. She took no shit, and was not afraid of anyone. James had respected her the moment he’d met her. 

“Heard you went and got yourself banned from Quidditch.” She said, folding her arms. 

“I can explain-” James started to speak, but Angela wasn’t finished. 

“No need. I’ve heard the rumors. Pretty nasty ones, actually. Can’t quite believe them, if I’m honest with you.” Angela said. 

“And you shouldn’t!” James said hastily. 

Angela raised an eyebrow at him, making his integrity wince. 

“Oh really? Why not, Potter? Tell me what I’m going to do now that I have to find another Seeker, and train them, within the week before our biggest match of the season! No one’s a better Seeker than you, but you’ve gone and got yourself practically expelled! I have half a mind to hex you where you stand!” 

Her voice was growing louder by the second, and Gryffindors close by were starting to listen in. If he wanted to avoid a full out fight, he needed to say something. Anything. Right now. 

“Okay fine, the rumor may be true. But I never met to hurt anyone! It was an accident, I swear! And I know this will never be enough, but I’m really, truly sorry Angela. I’d do anything,  _ anything,  _ to rescue this situation.” 

Angela raised an eyebrow again, one of her more common expressions. 

“Really, Potter? Anything?” 

James nodded fervently. “Yes.” 

She hesitated for a moment, then smacked him across the face. 

“Find me a new goddamn Seeker!” She shouted. 

Then she made her way back to her friends at the Gryffindor table, who were trying to control their laughter. 

James stood there, touching his hurt cheek lightly with his finger tips.  _ Ouch.  _ He supposed he’d deserved it though. After all, it was his fault that they would lose the biggest Quidditch game of the year. His eyes found Remus, who didn’t look very sympathetic at the moment. The expression he wore was one that said,  _ you just got what you deserved.  _ He stopped staring before Remus could notice his face flushing red with the heat of embarrassment.

“So,” Sirius said, clapping James’ shoulder as James slumped onto the bench. “Have we learned our lesson now?” 

“Yes,” James said fervently. “Never let Angela confront you in the Great Hall.” 

Sirius laughed. “I have to admit, while that was highly entertaining, it was also ruthless.” 

James shoved the contents of his plate around with his fork. “You try being me right now.” 

“I’ll pass.” Sirius replied. 

James couldn’t help looking down the table at Remus again. 

“Does he still hate me?” James asked Sirius. 

“Probably. He might be sitting with us if he didn’t.” Sirius hesitated, almost putting the next bite of his potatoes into his mouth before continuing. “Maybe you should ask him that question yourself.” 

James sighed. “I don’t think that now’s a good time.” 

“Then what  _ will  _ be a good time?” 

“I don’t know.” 

****

The Quidditch field looked gloomy. Incoming storm clouds had begun to draw closer, blocking out the sun. There was a thin chill in the air that made James shudder slightly in his thin jacket. He hadn’t anticipated the cold. But James was determined. 

Angela walked up to his right. Her eyes squinted as she surveyed the field. 

“You’re lucky the storm’s not here yet,” She said, looking up at the sun behind the clouds. “I reckon you got a couple hours before the rain comes.” 

James followed her gaze at the sky. “That’s still enough time.” 

“Well, I better get back. And you’d better find me a Seeker, Potter.” She turned headed back towards the locker room. 

James looked at the clipboard in his left hand. On it were the names of every Gryffindor who even had the slightest bit of potential of being a half-decent Seeker. Sirius, Peter, and himself had worked halfway into the night creating this list. Once they had finished bickering, a solid list of about fifteen names had come through. 

Those lucky fifteen were on their way toward him now. He turned around and waited for the red-robed figures to reach him. When he could see their faces, he tried to attach a name on the list to the right face. He was fairly certain he recognized Ally Hoolgi. She’d come to try-outs before. Right now, she wore a disgruntled expression on her face, as if being within a foot of him reminded her of approaching something smelly. Next to her, stood Bill Travecci. James was ninety percent sure he was Russian, an assumption he certainly hadn’t made due to his heavy Russian accent. He remembered him because he’d been interested in Lily. Let’s just say James had put a stop to that. The last person James recognized was Miley Rambo. Before Sirius’ new obsession with Marlene, he’d remembered hearing about a certain fling with Miley, who’d ended up heartbroken. 

This was going to be messy. 

“Alright,” He said. “Thank you all for coming. As you know, the Gryffindor team is in need of a new Seeker-” 

“Thanks to you.” Someone in the group muttered. 

James chose to ignore the comment. 

“As I was saying, the Gryffindor team needs a new Seeker. Angela has, for reasons unknown, decided to task me with finding one. So, thanks for coming. Go ahead and grab a broom from there, and some gloves-” He gestured to the broom shed. “and then come meet me back here. When you return, I want you to group yourselves into three groups of five.” 

They headed to the broom shed, in little groups of two or three. James could hear the little mutters of dissent as he watched them walk away. Why had Angela made him do this? To humiliate him? No, she had already done that. This must’ve just been torture. 

They returned moments later, grouping themselves as he had asked. When everyone was back, he began his instructions. 

“In a real game, Seekers have to remain laser focused in the midst of many distractions. But due to a lack of volunteers to assist me, today, you’ll only have one. You’re group one, two, and three.” He pointed at each group in turn. “Two people in the group will be Beaters. Their job is to distract,  _ but not to harm,  _ the other three Seekers while they are looking for this.” He held up the Snitch in his gloved hand. “The other three, you are obviously Seekers. Your job is to find and catch the Snitch before the other two members of your team do. Once you do, touch to the ground and hold it up in the air so I can confirm who caught it. Group two and three, sit to the side. Group one, follow me.” 

Group one consisted of Beaxley, Howell, Trexell, Modem, and Travecci. He handed Beaxley and Howell the Beater’s Bats and turned to Trexell, Modem, and Travecci. 

“You’ll play the Seekers.” He said to them. 

He released the Snitch and the Bludgers. 

“On my whistle. Three, two, one-” He blew the whistle. 

Immediately, Travecci took off like a shot. He headed in the general direction of where James had sent the Snitch flying. 

“Good trajectory.” James muttered to himself, and made a note. 

Modem and Trexell were struggling more. They had taken off at the whistle blow, but seemed to have no sense of direction. Modem had given up to watch the two “Beaters” take turns hitting the ball. Trexell was circling the pitch lazily. 

“Oi!” James shouted at Beaxley and Howell. “You two are supposed to be Beaters, not playing some bloody baseball game! And you two! Look for the damn Snitch!” 

Modem shrugged, and joined Trexell in circling the pitch. Within minutes, Travecci had touched down to the group, holding the fluttering ball in his hands. 

James waved the rest of the group down. 

“That has got to be some of the shoddiest attempts at a try-out that I have ever seen!” He yelled. “You weren’t even trying! Travecci got the Snitch within practically a minute! Do any of you even want to be here?” 

They were silent. Travecci handed the Snitch back to James. 

“Get off the field.” 

No one moved. 

“Get off! Right now! You lot are a sorry excuse for potential Seekers.” 

They started walking back, when James hesitated. 

“Travecci.” 

Travecci stopped walking. 

“You stay here. I’m going to run the next two groups, and if I don’t see anyone better than you, you’re Seeker.” 

Travecci didn’t respond. He just took a seat on the ground and closed his eyes. 

“This is going just brilliantly.” James muttered darkly to himself. Then he approached the next two groups. 

For the next hour, he ran them through all the drills he could think of. And for the next hour, most of them continued to evade his instructions. Except a chosen few. Every once in a while, he would turn around and see Travecci sitting on the pitch, sometimes watching, sometimes simply sitting with his eyes closed. James secretly longed for his kind of serenity. 

“Alright.” He said. “We’ve finally narrowed it down to the last three. Or four, I should say. Travecci! Come over here.” 

Travecci stood and joined the small number of people standing in front of him. 

“Out of all of the fifteen, you lot played the best. Go on and head back inside. I’ll let you know my decision tomorrow. Thank you.” 

****

As James took off his gear with the rest of them, he looked at them all carefully. Rambo had made it through. She’d played brilliantly, finding the Snitch almost as fast as Travecci. Gunther had stayed due to his uncanny broom skills. He could maneuver quickly into and out of any position he wanted, and just as fast as he had been there, he could be gone. Hoolgi hadn’t made his cut, much to his chagrin, but Davis had. She had very keen eyesight, and was highly observant. 

And then there was Travecci. James had only seen him play once, and then he knew. There was some unhinged, raw talent in him. Travecci was a potential threat. Part of him considered the thought that he might’ve only been here for revenge. But then again, if he was still angry, why now? It had been a year. Surely, Travecci wasn’t still holding onto grudges that old. 

James felt slight raindrops landing on his head once he walked outside. He had timed it perfectly. He shoved his clipboard into his robes and went to go talk to Sirius and Peter. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you're enjoying the story! I know I haven't done my best being consistent lately, so here's the deal. For the rest of the month, I'm going to update as often as I can, however, I'm going to be taking more time to get ahead of myself so I can actually have something to post and release things when I said I would. So there will be only two updates in February, the second and fourth week, and then hopefully starting in March, I can get back to posting every week! Thank you for understanding, I appreciate you all so much, you're the greatest. Stay safe and happy out there!


	9. Quidditch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually sticking to my deadlines! Surprise! It's a quidditch chapter, folks, enjoy :)

“How were try-outs?” Peter asked, rolling over in his bed to face James. 

“Abysmal.” James said grimly. “But I got through it. These are the potential Seekers.” 

He tossed Peter the clipboard. Peter scanned the names quickly, then passed it to Sirius.

“Travecci?” He asked, looking up at James, who was now seated in the red armchair. “Isn’t that-” 

“The guy who tried to make a move on Lily.” James confirmed. 

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Didn’t think we’d run into him again.” 

“I didn’t think so either.” James said. “But he’d make a ruddy good Seeker. Wicked fast on that broom, and caught the Snitch almost instantly.” 

“Maybe that’s why Lily liked him more than she did you.” Sirius said, in a teasing tone. 

James flushed. “Shut up.” 

Sirius handed the clipboard back to James. “Well? Are you going to make him your replacement?” 

“No.” James replied. “Maybe. I don’t know. Told everyone that I’d tell them tomorrow.” 

“You should set aside your personal bias,” Peter suggested. “Right now, what matters is winning that Quidditch game.” 

James turned on him, about to speak when Sirius interrupted. 

“He’s right, you know.” He said. “I didn’t want to say anything, but this is more important than Lily Evans.” 

James glared at both of them for a moment. He wanted to say,  _ “Nothing is more important than Lily Evans.” _ , but inwardly he knew it wasn’t true. 

“Okay, fine.” James said. “I guess you’re both right, which is surprising, seeing you never are.” 

Peter and Sirius grinned. And that was the moment that Remus Lupin decided to walk in the dorm room. He froze for an instant, looking at the group of them, and James suddenly felt a flush of embarrassment. If they had been on speaking terms, Remus would’ve been a part of these types of conversations. 

“Remus-” James started to speak. 

Remus held up his hand. 

“Don’t talk to me.” He said quietly. 

James fell silent. Deep inside his mind, he knew he had to fix things with Remus. But that was proving to be more difficult than he had thought it would be. And every second longer without him, James was beginning to feel more and more frustrated with Remus, and less with himself. This was stupid. They were best friends! Surely they could move past this. James stood up. 

“No, Remus.” He said. “I won’t not talk to you. I’m tired of this.” 

Remus turned. “You’re tired of this? You? You’re tired of your own reckless behavior that almost got someone killed? Well, this is a surprise.” 

“Can you stop bringing that up? Can’t we move past this? You’re my best mate! Stop making both of us live in my past mistakes, or we will never be able to move forward! Don’t you have anything that you felt terrible about doing afterwards? Can you not understand how bad I feel? I’ve been trying to move on, but I’m stuck, Remus, because you can’t forgive me!” 

He had shocked them all into a stunned silence. Never in his life had he found himself full on letting out his frustration and anger. He mostly kept it all bottled inside, struggling to communicate with others without letting it blow out of proportion. But this was a relationship he cared about. Remus needed to know how he felt. 

The room stood frozen in an uncomfortable silence that seemed to last ages. James was looking at Remus, and Remus looking back at him. Sirius and Peter were frozen, each looking at Remus and James in turn, appearing to attempt to gauge their reactions. 

“Okay,” Remus said. “I forgive you. After all, you’re my best mate.” 

James cracked a smile, and went in for a hug. Remus seemed surprised at first, but then relaxed into the embrace. 

“Oh thank the LORD, I thought you two would NEVER make up.” 

Their fifth roommate, Kingsley Shacklebolt, had entered the dorm. James and Remus broke away from the hug and looked at him with a confused expression on their faces. Sirius was the first to ask what the hell was happening. 

“What do y’mean?” He asked. 

Kingsley crossed over to his bed, and set his book bag down gently. 

“The entire house of Gryffindor has had a bet going on who was going to speak to who first, how long they were going to last not talking to each other, etcetera, etcetera.” Kingsley waved his hand, as if that explained it. “The point is, Weasley bet me five galleons you wouldn’t speak until after the Quidditch match. So, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go collect on my wager.” 

And with a sweep of his robes, he exited the dorm as quickly as he had come. 

Sirius gwuaffed. “Merlin, that’s hilarious. James, it seems everyone’s more obsessed with you than you thought.”

“The only thing that they’re going to be is angry, if they lost a bet.” Remus said drily, more amused than he cared to let on. 

James flopped on his bed, clipboard in hand. “Eh, I don’t really care. I’ve got this ruddy list to figure out. And I’ve got my friend back.” 

“Not to mention homework.” Peter chimed in. 

“Oi, shut up, Peter.” The other three said in unison. 

*****

The day of the Slytherin versus Gryffindor Quidditch match was rainy. Giant storm clouds covered the Great Hall’s ceiling, enchanted to reflect whatever weather was occurring outside, and the occasional crack of thunder could be heard over the chatter of students. Earlier in the week, James had decided on Molly Davis as his replacement. The look on Travecci’s face had been priceless. But even so, James had a weird feeling his decision would come back to haunt him later. 

Sirius’ voice brought him back to the present. 

“So, dearest Minnie won’t even let you watch the game?” Sirius asked, for what felt like the 600th time in a row. 

“I already told you, yes.” James said moodily, stabbing at his sausage. 

“That’s bloody awful. Cruel and unusual punishment, if you ask me.” Sirius replied. 

“Just eat your eggs.” James said curtly. He didn’t need any further reminders of his punishment. 

“You sound just like my mum.” Remus commented. 

James looked at him, affronted. 

“I do not!” 

Sirius snorted. “To be fair, you sound like  _ anyone’s _ mum.” 

James glared at him. “Oh, shut up.” 

They returned to companionable silence, Peter and Sirius scarfing away at the breakfast food, while Remus and James picked at it. Before they left the Great Hall, Headmaster Dippet made an announcement. 

“In the place of your fifth hour classes, students will instead be released to the Quidditch stands. All houses must stick together behind the appropriate banners. Please remember, anyone caught meddling with the players on the field will be punished by their head of house. The Gryffindor and Slytherin teams are to be released thirty minutes early from their classes to prepare for the game. May the best team win!” 

The benches scraped as everyone headed toward their first classes. James had reluctantly risen from the bench when he found himself in front of Professor McGonagall. 

“Potter.” She said sharply. “You’ll report to your first detention tonight at six o’clock. Professor Slughorn will be expecting you. Don’t be late.” 

“But, Professor, what if Gryffindor wins?” James asked her desperately. “Then I’ll miss-” 

“I seem to remember you thinking that Gryffindor would lose without you,” Professor McGonagall said. “If that is still the case, I would assume that you have nothing to worry about.” 

Her witty retort surprised him. She must have been more upset that he wasn’t playing then she was letting on. So instead of revealing how much she had upset him, he smiled. 

“I suppose you’re right then.” He winked, startling her with his rudeness, then ran to catch up with Sirius and the rest of them. 

“What was that all about?” Remus asked him. 

“My first detention. Tonight with Professor Slughorn.” He told them. 

“But, what if Gryffindor wins?” Sirius asked. “Then you’ll miss-” 

“That’s exactly what I said.” James replied. “Dear old Minnie didn’t seem to care. Rather rude about it, if you ask me.” 

“Well, it’s a fair punishment, if you ask me.” Remus said. 

James nodded reluctantly. “I guess you’re right. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not upset.” 

Sirius nudged him. “Hey, think on the bright side. You’ll have tons of free time, and an entirely empty castle.” 

“Except for Filch,” Peter chimed in. “He never attends. Claims Ms. Norris, that ratty cat, will get bludgeoned by a bludger.” 

“Ugh. I hate that ruddy cat.” James said. “Always sticking her nose in other people’s business.” 

Multiple pranks had been sabotaged by Ms. Norris, Filch’s cat. She was a brown striped cat, with striking green eyes, which reminded James eerily of Lily’s. Not that he’d ever make that comparison out loud, of course. Although he admitted to himself, it did make sense seeing that neither of them approved of the boys constant pranks and marauding. 

“I’ll probably just wander about the castle. Go into empty classrooms and the like. If I’m desperate, I might even head to the library.” 

Sirius gwuaffed. “James Potter in the library! I thought the day would never come.” 

****

“It’s a stormy day for a game of Quidditch, but the stands are full as always for the most important game of the year!”

Vernon Gibley, the announcer for all Quidditch matches, had finally begun the narration. Sirius, Remus, and Peter, along with the rest of the population of the school, had bundled up to brave the rainy weather. They’d been in the stands for what had felt like an eternity, when Vernon’s voice had finally reached Sirius’ ears. He rubbed his hands together for warmth, shivering even under all the layers of clothes. 

“James is lucky he isn’t here, it’s a ruddy awful day for a Quidditch match.” Remus muttered. 

Sirius and Peter nodded silently, then turned to look down to the field. 

Through the rain pouring down from the sky, Sirius could just make out the Gryffindor Quidditch team. They, like the rest of Hogwarts, were already sopping wet, and probably more miserable than those in the stands. 

The Slytherin team exited last, looking slightly more comfortable. Sirius squinted, sure his eyes were fooling him, only to find that he was correct. Somehow, all of the Slytherins’ brooms weren’t affected by the water. He turned to poke Peter, who always seemed to know what was going on. 

“Do you see their brooms?” He said, pointing. 

Peter followed Sirius’ pointing finger, and nodded. 

“They’re magicked, I reckon. Some kind of instant drying spell.” 

“Well, that’s bloody brilliant.” Remus said sarcastically. “Game hasn’t even started yet, and they’re already cheating.” 

The teams shot into the air, while the two opposing Seekers, Gryffindor Miley Davis, and Slytherin, Travis Duncan, remained on the ground, poised to take off at the moment the whistle sounded. 

Vernon Gibley’s voice rang through the stands once more. 

“The Gryffindor and Slytherin teams are ready, waiting for the sound of Madam Hooch’s whistle. Remember, the first Seeker to catch the Golden Snitch wins one-hundred and sixty points for their team, and ends the game. This round, the Gryffindor’s have a new Seeker. Miely Davis sure has a lot to live up to, given the past success of James Potter, who made a name for himself after catching the Snitch merely ten minutes into his first game. Oh, it looks like Madam Hooch is making her way onto the field with the trunk. She’s released the bludgers. Out goes the Snitch. The Quaffle is up, ladies and gentlemen! Let the game begin!”   
  


Whizzing through the air, the Gryffindor’s Chaser managed to score the first ten points, much to the dismay of the Slytherin’s Keeper. Sirius cheered along with the rest of the Gryffindors. So far, so good. 

The trouble started when one of the Slytherin’s Beaters openly sent a Bludger swinging into a Gryffindor Chaser’s face, sending her careening to the ground. This caused even Remus to lose his cool. 

“Foul!” He shouted into the rain. “He cheated! That was a direct hit!” 

Sirius had to lay a hand on his shoulder. 

“They’re Slytherins.” He said quietly. “It’s never going to be a fair match.” 

The Slytherins were up by ten, mostly due to the loss of the Gryffindor Chaser. The Gryffindor Beaters were playing more aggressively now. Suddenly, something caught Sirius’ eye. He grabbed Remus’ shoulder once more, this time in excitement. 

“Look!” He pointed. “There! Davis has seen the Snitch!” 

And so she had. She was hurtling through the rain, in a steep downwards slope, her hand outstretched. Gibley announced Davis’ find, which sent the Slytherin Seeker sloping downwards as well. For a moment, the entire stadium seemed to stand still as they waited to see who would pull up first. Duncan appeared to make a grab for it, but Davis shoved him away. He peeled off at the last second, and Davis tumbled to the ground, head over heels, off her broom. 

Sirius couldn’t breathe. He wasn’t certain they had won until Davis stood, holding a clenched fist up in the air. 

“It appears that Davis has done it! Davis caught the Snitch! Gryffindor wins!” Gibley announced. 

The stands erupted into cheers, mostly from the Gryffindor section. Davis’ teammates alighted down next to her and lifted her up into the air, cheering along with the other Gryffindors. Sirius screamed until his voice went hoarse. They had done it! 

“It seems that Gryffindor can win without their precious Potter!” Gibley said. 

The comment went unheard by most of the students, except for Sirius, Peter, and Remus, who weren’t quite distracted enough by the victory to lose total concentration. They frowned. 

“I’ll punch him,” Peter suggested. “I’ll knock him out.” 

“No.” Sirius said. “That won’t work. Besides, it isn’t worth it. James didn’t hear.” 

“Yeah, but the Slytherins probably did.” Remus said grimly. 


End file.
